Feeling Guilty About Spanking

As a kid, I think I was never spanked. Otherwise, I would remember.
Spanking leaves an indelible mark in the mind of child. To many, that mark can fester into adulthood. One of my daughter said, in one of those family get- togethers' free-flowing edectic conversation, i was the only one spanked among my brothers. Although he said it nonchalanty, with a small smile on his face, I could feel the hidden carried in her chest all those years!
"You were spanked?!" i cried, looking at this nice young child who was my pried and joy. I could not remember. "Yes, by you, and also by papa."

I looked at my husband. he shrugged his shoulder, which was a cross between I don't remember or what does it matter, and left it at that.
But I panicked, to put it mildly. Not so much by the spanking, but by the way my daughter grew up with that thought for why would she even mention it many years later? I ached to pusue the issue but afraid of making it worse. Quite comfortably, that spanking done in love will make a child remember important lessons in life.Look at how well you turned out to be. You are loved, you are blessed. As a workoing mom in all of my children's growing up years, guilt weighed me down. i was wary of not playing mt role well. And so when i hear words that point to those years, my guilt is magnified many times over.

Researching on spankiong as a tool for discipline, I have learned that indeed the Good Book espouses it: Proverbs 23:13-14, "Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you strike him with a rod, you will save his soul from Sheol."

Had I know what I know today, i would have been a better spanker, or non-spanker. here are five tips I culled from my reading:
1. Give advance warning. Explain to your child where he/she did wrong. let him know that the next time he does it, he/she will be spanked. It's like issuing a memo to in the workplace first, second, and third warning before the punishment comes.
2. Don't do it anger. When you see red, escape to a corner and try to calm down before you spank. Otherwise, you will regret it for the rest of your life.
3. Stick to your word. Of you say you will spank the next time your child repeats his misbehavior, do so.
4. Keep to the buttocks. They are fleshy and don't maintain permanent damage.
5. reassure. a few hours after, or when the time seems right, explain to your child why he/she spanked and reassure him/her that it was his misdeed you hate, not him/her.

Easier said than dine? Whoever said motherhood is easy. But trying really hard, always leads to a happy ending; and takes away unwanted guilt.

Think about your drink

Did you know that nearly a quarter of the total calories consumed by children and teens come from beverages? With childhood obesity at an all-time high, you may be thinking a lot about what your kids eat. but are you thinking enough about what they drink?

Every Sip Counts

In the two decades, the percentage of overweight American children and teens has tripled. What America Drinks.

According to the study:

* The largest calories contributors for children aged 8-13 are nutrient-poor sweetened beverages including soft drinks, fruit drinks and presweetened teas.

* on average, teen boys consumed 32 ounces of sweetened beverages a day contributing 13% of total daily calories. Teen girls drank 22 ounces-an average of 12% of total daily calories.

* The average teen girl consumed only 7 ounces of milk a day-while teen boys consumed 12 ounces each day.

Re-Think Your Drink

The message is clear: What’s in your glass can make a big difference.

* The unique mix of essential nutrients found in milk-including calcium and protein-play a key role in maintaining a healthy weight.

* Teen who drank higher amounts of milk and lower amounts of sweetened beverages tended to weigh less than those who consumed more sweetened beverages and less milk.

* Their diets were notably higher in essential nutrients like calcium, vitamin A, magnesium and potassium.

Encourage kids and grown-ups alike to drink 24 ounces of low fat or fat free milk every 24 hours. This simple step can get your family on track for a healthier weight.

Just for Kids

Shoes for babies’ first steps, dresses for your little fashionista, and stuff to keep your kids happily busy

1.Dress up. Let your kids express their style with periwinkle. The girl’s collection has details like handsmocking, beadwork and embroideries. Designs for the junior collection include vintage race cars, sports, and jungle animals.Periwinkle is available at Rustan’s, select SM and Robinsons malls, and Trinoma.

2.Hampton style. Ralph Lauren is the epitome of preppy fashion, and its childrenswear collection ranging from nautical inspired to dressier ensembles is not different. Hampton Stables gives preppy sportswear an equestrian twist while Hampton Athletic is defined by strong tennis reference.Ralp Lauren Childrenswear is located at Rustan’s makati and Rustan’s Tower

3.Baby steps.Tod’s has crated a collection where each style is unique and ideal for children’s first steps and games. Loafers and sneakers recall the design of the adult collection, but are perfect for toddlers. Two-toned sandals for girls are whimsical. Tod’s boutique is located in Greenbelt 4,Ayala Center.

4.Good for rainy day.Now kids can wear Crocs year round, even during the rainy season. Kids Aspen have the same easy on and off concept, but without holes. And they can splash through puddles and play in the mud wearing Kids Georgie boots. Crocs are slip-resistant, anti-micobial and odor-resistant

5.Lunchbox essential.Keep drinks hot or coldfor hour with the Sunnex Vacuum Flask. When you screw the lid on, thering bottom automatically closes so there’s no spilling. The flask can be bought with leather coversleeves. The Sunnex Colored Mug with spout

is good for drinking on the go. it has a convenientslide on cover and easygrip handle.

6.Groovy kind of girl.

GroovyGirl have their own sense of funky style. Each doll has a one of a kind look expressed in her hair

style, skin tone, and hip outfit-just like girls in real life. The dolls, made for girls age 4,12 are distributed in Rustan’s Fully Booked, Powerbooks and Bookwagon.

7.Pretty in pink. Barbie has come up with a personal care and cosmetics line specially designed for young girl. The products are fun, trendy, and safe for kids. The line includes hair care, moisturizing soap, lotion, colongne, powder, and cosmetics. Barbie is available in SM Department Store.

Put Bad Dreams To Bed

You can’t stop the nightmares, but you can help your kids cope

We’ve all had them-nightmares that cause us to wake up sweating and trembling. Almost all kids have nightmares from time to time. These usually occur during the last third of the night (between 4 a.m. and 6 a.m.) in REM (rapid eye movement) sleep, which is when we actually dream.

As a parent, you cannot always stop these bad dreams from happening. But you can deal with them effectively when they happen again. Here are some important things to remember:

*Don’t give them the ammunition One of the most common causes of bad dreams is a frightening experience, which happened earlier in the day. So don’t let them watch television programs or read books with aliens, ghost, or monsters before bedtime.

*Leave a light on This will not always put a stop nightmares,but it can often help. Sometimes a child will start having terrifying thoughts before he falls asleep. This happens much less if he can see what’s around him. Also, when a child wakens abruptly from a bad dream, he will probably be in a very bad state. Having a light on will help him calm down much faster.

*Reassure him It’s important to make him feel safe and secure. Help him understand that nothing bad is going to happen, and that all boys and girls have bad dreams. Give him a big hug; tell him that you will always be there.

Another kind of bad dream is called a night terror. This taken place earlier in the night (between 1 a.m and 3 a.m) during the deep stage of non-REM sleep. This is when child wakes up screaming with his eyes wipe open, when in reality, he is still asleep. The child will unexpectedly sit up. usually sweating profusely; shout out loud for a few seconds, before lying back down and returning to a normal sleep. When this happens, do not try to wake him. This can make then situation worse. Instead wait for the terror to pass and then try to settle him back into bed. This is something that he’ll outgrow, and happens less often than nightmares. Don’t worry. Ti would be helpful to set aside time at the breakfast table every morning to talk about your child’s dreams. Doing this lets your child know that this is a safe and even fun part of life to be shared. Drawing dreams. making a game of dress up, and fixing the scary ending in a make-believe drama are also good ways to help your child express his dreams. This will ultimately make him feel that he has power over both the subconscious and conscious events in his daily life. Share some of your dream, too!

Just me and Daddy

A dad suggest 10 bonding ideas you can incorporate into your existing family schedule

1Take your child to school at least twice a week. The Traffic can be an opportunity to talk, without distractions like TV or homework.

2Visit your old school campus together. i look my son to UP one Saturday. My wife prepared a simple picnic lunch, and she "volunteered" to watch the food(in other words, nap under the trees).

3Share the comic books of your childhood. If you don't have any comic books, go to web. many fans have scanned their and posted it for viewing. With all the old comic book heroes of the past being made over into big-budget Hollywood films, you'll actually gey "cool dad" points.

4Wash the car together. Kids love this. Wear bathing suits and hose each other down. Water guns are welcome- the bigger, the better. (Another fun activity, give the dog a bath).

5Put together a toy model. Great for older kids. There are plenty to choosse from: robots,planes,all with amazing detail. he more expensive ones include a motor and batteries, so hey actually work. Admit it. you've always wanted one of these- and since "it's for the kids" the wife won't complain.

6Take funny pictures os each other. My son loves my gadgets, and when we're waiting at restaurants or killing time till dinner, I let him play photograph with my camera phone. Once, at the mall, we went to the photo booth while taped on my PC- they're hilarious.

7Go to the video arcade. My wife hates this place because it's loud, flashy, and involves cars and zombies. My kids and I love it because it's loud,flashy, and involves car and zombies.

8Do "group reading." I found this great series, "You Read To Me/I read To You". They're bedtime stories with different speaking parts, which my wife and I would read aloud to our son (he'd be sandwiched between us, clapping at the all right parts). You can get them at Amazon or order it though Powerbooks. worth it.

9Make a midnight snack together. I fully support my wife's effort to prepare balanced, healthy meals. But late Friday or Saturday nights, sometime my son and I raid the fridge for leftovers which we eat while watching movies. It's naughty, but it's fun. and I always make him drink milk with the cookies, swear.

10Make a separate grocery list. My wife and I take separate carts at the supermarket. She get the boring basic laundry soap and cooking oil, while my son and I have a separate list. She can take her time debating which shampoo to get, while my son and I tackle more important questions, like ice cream flavor.